Wednesday, May 28, 2008

New Feature


Welcome to the BLOG Theater. powered by THE BLOG REPORT Once a month, the BLOG Theater will perform a show. If I can, I might put a video on for some of it. But that's going to be later. Some shows may be shown two or more times. Now let's get to the presentation. NOW PRESENTING IN THE BLOG THEATER: PHANTOM OF THE KEYS

SILENCE IS GOLDEN.

Please dim the lights around your computer.

And now, our feature presentation.

Act 1

Deep in St. Potatosberg lives the St. Potatosburg Opera House. They have been busy on their upcoming opera: ATTACK OF THE POTATO PEELERS.
Tonight is opening night. The citizens of St. Potatosburg (which are half potato) come to see the show. There is very few tickets at the will call, thus leaving many citizens outside the Opera House. Lucky for them, there is little openings in the wall of the house.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to our opening presentation of ATTACK OF THE POTATO PEELERS!" says the manager of St. Potatosburg Opera House. "We have worked very hard on this show and we hope you enjoy it. I would like to introduce to you the directer of the show: Mr. David Spudd."

The crowd applauds at this. There is more noise coming from Scott and Jeanne and Bri Spudd than anyone else.

"Thank you, Mr. Mash." says David to the manager." I would like to thank my family for helping me and cheering me on to write this production. I would also like to thank the St. Potatosburg Opera House for letting me do this production. And without further a do, I present to you, ATTACK OF THE POTATO PEELERS."

The audience applause and gradually becomes quiet.

The overture music begins and ends.

Then the opening song begins. But there's other music playing too. David Spudd is very confused. He goes down to the orchestra and asks the conductor, "Is anyone in your band playing anything different that I assigned you to have them play?" The conductor shakes his head no. Now David Spudd is confused as ever. But then the music becomes louder. A piano is playing it. He turns to the spare piano. It's playing all by itself. It all becomes clear to David Spudd.

He runs to the nearest microphone and says "RUN! The show is canceled." The audience can't understand why. "THE LEGENDARY PHANTOM OF THE KEYS IS HERE!" Everything is quiet, except... the spare piano. Now the audience understands. Everyone in the audience says "Oooh." Then they all scream and run. The parents grab their young ones and leave the theater. But Mr. Mash thinks different. He grabs the microphone from David and tells everyone to take their seat. "Are you insane?" says David. "The Phantom of the Keys is real. Can't you hear--"

"Yes, I hear the piano very well, Spudd. It's just one of those things that makes the piano play automatically."

"Have you heard of the Phantom of the Keys legend?"

"Yes, and it is unreal."

Then the curtain falls off the stage.

David was young and quick enough to avoid being hit by the curtain, but Mash was unfortunate and got caught. David couldn't take it any longer. He ran out of the theater avoiding anything Keys did.

One day later

"Last night, an attack came on the St. Potatosburg Opera House. People say that writer David Spudd said that the legendary Phantom of the Keys attacked the theater. The curtain was destroyed. The glass windows broke. And the chairs were all over the place. Despite the damage, everyone survived." said the TV newswoman.

"Oh-ho-ho! Everyone, eh. What about Mash?! That Diva Eata! She never says what really happens. Mash probably died last night. That curtain fell straight on him!" said David Spudd angrily.

"Come on, Dave. Don't get to hasty!," said Bri Spudd.

"HASTY! If Mash had listened none of this would happen!"

"You tried your best, David, you did your best," said Jeanne.

"I know. But... I've got to find the Phantom."

"WHAT?!? ARE YOU INSANE!? YOU'LL DIE TOO!" yelled Bri, Scott, and Jeanne Spudd.

"I have to."

"Don't be a hero, David. You'll die just doing an adventure!" said Bri.

"I won't. Trust me."

David Spudd left his home to defeat the Phantom of the Keys once and for all.

INTERMISSION
Act II

" Now according to legend, the Phantom lives in Nepal. I'll need a plane ticket in order to get there," says David Spudd.

"Wait! Don't go!"

David turned around and a weak, transparent Mr. Mash appears.

"Mash..."

"H-h-he's too dangerous! GO!"

"No, Mash. I'll save you. Trust me."

"Ok, Spudd."

Then, with a breath of wind, Mash disappeared.

"Trust me, Mash. Trust me. Now for the ticket."

When David turned around, shadowy creatures with sharp blades as fingers appeared.

"HUH! The potato peelers!"

"LOOK OUT!" said a voice.

A girl whose name was Kiana appeared. She had a sword to fight with. "Let's go," she said.

"Go where? The exit?" asked David Spudd.

"Nope. Let's go fight."

"That's what I was afraid of." muttered David Spudd.

"Here! Catch!" Kiana said throwing a sword.

"Well, I guess this is the only way." said Dave.

They started fighting the Potato Peelers like there was no tomorrow.

At the end of the battle, they got two plane tickets to Nepal. Next stop, the Temple of the Phantom of the Keys.

Act III

"According to legend the Temple should be in another mile," said Dave Spudd. "Time to make history."

"And make the world a safer place," added Kiana.

"Right," said Dave.

They walked the mile fighting more potato peelers. Then they saw it. The Temple of the Phantom of the Keys.

They saw the horrifying face of the Phantom, but none seemed concerned.

"Where's Mash?" asked Dave.

"Marty? He is in torture and there is nothing you can do about it. MUAHAHAHAHAHA! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" said the Phantom like a Hag. He looked like one, too, excluding a Hag's bird beak.

David got outraged and pounced on the Phantom. He gave the Phantom a few good body blows.
"Is that all you got?" challenged the Phantom , his voice a little bolder.

"HURRRAGH!" yelled David, aiming a punch toward the Phantom's face. He it his target, sending his enemy flying.

"You've got guts, kid. But you're weak. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" BAM! The Phantom punched David in the nose.

"Ugh!" David grunted. His nose was bleeding.

"NO!" yelled Kiana. She pulled out her sword and ran at the Phantom. It would of been a good hit, if the Phantom hadn't held back the attack with his bare hand. Kiana had no choice, but to let go of her sword. She quickly pulled out the other and engaged a duel with the Phantom. Kiana was skilled but she couldn't get the Phantom out of the way.

David looked at the duel to see Kiana's skills weren't good enough. He felt in his pocket, now discovering he brought a gun with him. He shot at the Phantom's forehead, buttox, chest, and private. But then he remembered the Phantom's weak spot: the nose. He shot him there and the Phantom fell. The Phantom was dead. Kiana and David ran to each other to celebrate there was no time. The temple was crumbling. They had to evacuate. They did so. Leaving everything inside behind.

Epilogue

Kiana, Mash, and David returned to the Spudd house to celebrate. The legend was no longer needed to be told. A true story of a Spudd defeating a legend was told.

THE END

Next time at the BLOG THEATER: Kingdom Hearts: The Post Revised Edition.

3 comments:

Scott Johnson said...

Adam, you write great stories! Thanks for including me! (Uncle Spudd)

Anonymous said...

Ahh... I remember that adventure like it was yesterday...

Adam Johnson said...

Yes, you guys were main characters. (Mostly David).

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